Monday, 2 January 2012
11:23 pm: And it goes on, isn't it?
Not ready for school tomorrow. It's like some nightmare, with tutorials pilling up and exams drawing near, sometimes I feel so depleted, well even DURING holidays. Depleted emotionally and physically and spiritually and in every single possible way you could probably think of. I mean like thinking back let's say for the past 3 years, so much has changed and I'm sort of not used to these changes and I'm really uncomfortable with them. Period. Well, actually yeah I have pretty much of stuffs I haven't sorted out and yes it's bugging me for some unknown reason. It's like you pretty much know the solution to it but you don't know how to get started kinda thing. Well sometimes I really just wanna walk up to you and let it all out and get a resolution and we're done kinda thing. Not so simple I guess cause it only happens in the movies. Ah.And to be honest I haven't done anything much of school work during the 2 weeks break. Gave God the first week and the second was spent working at Gongcha. Well, what a life I have. Knowing that I could get a better paying job anytime, I somehow choose to stay on and work there. Didn't really work for the money although I kinda need'em! Just wanna have fun and yeah. Well simply, the first reason I didn't quit it's cause I wanted to help my supervisor there. Could tell she's putting and giving her best in managing the outlet and she's like short of staff and there's so many things going on down there. I just wanna give a hand and really put myself into their shoes, feeling how these foreigners are feeling working in Singapore. I mean like you're paid peanuts and shit happens everyday, from customer complaints to internal politics etc. I just simply can't phantom how did they survive this? I mean like I'll just freak out and quit or something. If I were them. Thankfully I'm just a part-timer. Haha. Secondly, she's more of like a friend I guess, haha I remember I used to laugh and joke with my colleagues and have a good time, well there are changes, people move to other outlets and things change and we move on? I guess.
The 2 weeks break didn't really feel like a 2 weeks break. Well many things happened. I didn't feel like I was the same person before the 2 weeks, as if something's gotten into me. It really felt like it's been a 2 year break that made me look and take things from a different perspective. Just so blowing, I thought.